We don't know in return, we don't know who to believe. Problems keep happening from the brain and to the heart And everything that you have just seems to fall apart. When giving up seems like it's the only thing to do. I want to give up and end my life, But the only reason why Im still here is because I have people that care for me. I've been though alot in life, Sometimes I think theres nothing to live for in life. and I brake down and pull out the drugs. I'm never happy with myself. I'm packed full of pain. I've made a lot of mistakes in the past. There are a few particular ones that I'd give anything to be able to take back. I don't really know who I am anymore. I've pretty much lost myself over this past year. I believe in second chances. It's been 18 years of abuse. Now you ask why I do drugs.I am a addicted of many drugs, I have been since I was 11. My dad put them in my hand and told me they were candy, I belived him. I get cursed at everyday and I get told it's my fault that my dad suffers at work. But that changed my dad has been married to my mom for about 12 years but ever since I was born my dad got into drinking and then he became a addicted and abused my mom and told her the wrong things. So my mom lefted us. Ever since they my mom dose not keep in touch with me, She'd rather I die. She's married to a rich guy now. I wish I could tell her how much she means to me, I've tryed and she plushed me away. She think's I'll be like my dad. Im sorry for the pain. I shouldn't be here. Let's just all say, Im not you're average human, Im a fuck up but most people call me Rickie. I live in Thunder Bay. I have learned over the years that I can't really trust anyone, and friends are what you make of them.